Disrupted Rhythm

The daffodils in the front yard are bright yellow.  The rosebud trees down the street are in full bloom.  The flowers of the tulip poplars dot the neighborhood.  I don’t need a jacket as I step outside and my husband is already complaining about tree pollen allergies.   I check the calendar to make sure: yes, it is only March first.  What is going on?

I could ask the same question of myself as my own patterns are out of whack.  Recently retired, happily not working, I haven’t found a rhythm yet.  It worries me.  Each evening I vow that I will be showered and dressed before 10, yet most days you will find me reading the paper and solving the crossword puzzle in my pajamas until well after 10.  Once I am dressed, I wonder what book to read next, or should I work in my sketch journal, or perhaps I should exercise or what fun thing could I make for dinner.  After 36 years in the working world, 21 one of those as a teacher, I have no set schedule, no clear goals – no matter how many lists I make.

There is nothing I can do about the patterns of nature this year, so I go out on the deck and sit on the steps (too early to bring out the deck furniture?) and soak it in.  I listen to the excited birds, turn my face towards the sun, look up at the purple buds sprouting on our massive Silver Maple tree and just enjoy it.  Perhaps it’s okay to just enjoy my own disrupted rhythm, to go with the flow and see where it takes me.  At least for now.

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6 thoughts on “Disrupted Rhythm”

  1. I have had the same experience since finishing my dissertation. I haven’t quite found my rhythm after years of grad school, either. The end of your slice resonated with me-I’ll have to keep that in mind!

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  2. Glad to see you here! I am feeling the clear colors and wafting air in your “slice.” And envying you, although I know that to be without a rhythm is not easy. Acceptance and openness. Enjoy.
    (And thanks for the sticker chart delivery!)

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  3. Delighted you’re joining our writing community this year!

    I would imagine it’s hard to find a rhythm when you’re newly retired. My father retired last year and he’s often up first-thing in the morning at the grocery store buying something for a new dish he’ll cook later in the day. However, some days he just sleeps in and I think he enjoys that.

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  4. I say “go with the flow and see where it takes me.”
    Though it may feel uncertain, for all those years you had such a strict routine as a teacher it barely allowed even a bathroom break. You deserve the opposite, at least for a bit!

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  5. Sounds so relaxing, but I bet it is hard to figure out what to do with your time after working for so long. Hope you have a great time figuring it out! Welcome to the challenge…enjoy!! 🙂 Can’t wait to read more of your slices!

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  6. Congrats! What a wonderful disruption! I feel like I am in a similar place while on maternity leave. While I know I am taking care of a baby, the disruption to normal life seems so weird! My favorite line was ” I listen to the excited birds, turn my face towards the sun, look up at the purple buds sprouting on our massive Silver Maple tree and just enjoy it.” so descriptive and sensory! Thanks for sharing!

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